Saturday, July 18, 2009

Alert and a Petition for Canadian Waiting Families

I received an e-mail from my good friend Rhonda about a tragic situation that happened to a couple that she knows. Evidently their adoption agency went bankrupt and left them possibly with nothing, no hope for refunding their money or providing a referral.

I know that in the US, you can migrate to another agency. You may have to re-pay some fees and get a new homestudy, but you are not back at ground zero. It looks like in this case, this couple may have lost everything.

That is not right and should never happen to anyone. Please read the e-mail below and sign the petition. This needs to be stopped.

Below is Rhonda's e-mail. I'm sure she won't mind me putting it on here because she's cool about things like that.

I was wondering if you could do me a favour? Dear friends of ours were blindsided this week when their adoption agency went bankrupt. They have lost over $15K, but that's besides the point. They have lost the chance to adopt their child. They were roughly a month away from their referral for a child from Africa, and now with the bankruptcy, they don't know if the adoption can or will continue.

I was wondering if you could post something on your blog. Since you have a rather large readership, I was hoping you could post a link to the petition site.

Let me know, thanks!

LID-September 13/06

Friday, July 17, 2009

Playdate with the Tribe...

Yesterday we had a wonderful time hanging out with the Beckering Tribe/Never Too Many. Their house is the perfect place for little people. There is so much to do and it was nice to get away for a bit and have some adult conversation.

This picture is my favorite take-away from the day. Steff's Sophia made this beautiful drawing which shows her and my Sophia together surrounded by hearts and flowers. She tried so hard to make my Sophia comfortable and shared all of her toys with her. Andrew thought it was so funny that there were two Sophia's.

I had to steal this shot of Steffie, she was playing shy hostess...yeah whatever. Bust out the smile girl!

I had taken Sophia to swim once before at the hotel pool in Beijing and she clung to me for dear life. Here is where she started...on the stairs. She stayed there for a good 45 minutes.

Here is where she ended up...which is absolutely amazing to me. She asked for the tube and then swam all around the pool for well over an hour. She was in heaven, not afraid at all.

I just love this little girl and her big heart.

The whole posse, we could start a preschool with all of these kids!

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Learning to Fly...

There is a model airplane club that meets on Wednesdays and Sundays in the summertime at a farm by our house. For the past couple of years, we have gone there with the kids to watch the planes. My father was up a couple of summers ago and went with us. That year for Christmas, my Dad gave our family this model airplane. Last night we took the plane to the farm and Tyler got his first flying lesson.

Monday, July 13, 2009

How Do I Feel?

I have had a lot of people ask me about how I feel and how does it feel to adopt and how does it feel to adopt verses to have a bio child. I am sure that everyone's experiences are different, but I will tell you mine.

When I was pregnant with my sons, I knew a child was on the way. I had 9 months to prepare myself, but it was always a surprise when I saw their faces for the first time. There was a sense of anticipation with each one and a voice inside each time that said, "Well, there you are are and this is what you look like." I loved them because they were mine. They grew in my body and they were my babies. I cared for them instinctively and I grew to love them more and more each day as I gazed into their eyes and cared for them and watched them grow.

I wondered how I would feel when they put Sophia in my arms. I wondered if it would feel the same. I view her as the child of my soul. My daughter in every way, except God chose for her to be born in China.

It was very emotional for me when I saw the nanny carrying her down the sidewalk towards us in the guard shack. I had to hold back my tears because I didn't want to scare her anymore than she would be already. I kept thinking of Eli and how terrified he would be if I gave him to a Chinese family and left. I kept thinking of my little boy and what this would do to him if the tables were turned. I knew that day would impact her forever and the weight of what was about to happen weighed heavy on me.
It was truly gutwrenching when they placed Sophia in my arms. She is a smart girl and she had a pretty good idea of what was happening. She screamed to go back and tried everything to get away from me. It completely broke my heart.

There was also this underlying sadness. Here was this beautiful little girl with no one in the world. How could no one come forward for her? No Aunts or Uncles, no Grandparents. This little child all alone. It is a life changing experience to hold an orphan in your arms and look them in the face. To see a child truly alone. I claimed her then and there. With my heart and my soul I claimed her and I took her as my daughter and the voice inside of me said "Well, there you are and this is what you look like." And I knew that she was mine and that she would never be alone again.

I loved her then because I made the decision to love her and I am falling in love more and more each day as I gaze into her eyes and care for her.

I have been asked if I wonder sometimes if I did the right thing. I really don't. With each of my children, there was always a time (usually gazing at them through the plastic tub in my hospital room) when I felt a little overwhelmed and, here we go, it's you and me kid.
I know Sophia is meant to be here with us and more than anything I wonder about how to be the best mother I can to her. I wonder about the right things to do. I wonder about what I need to do differently with her to meet the special needs she is going to have. Right now I want to do everything right so that she knows she is loved and she is not alone and she will never be left again.

My daughter has scars, scars on her body from 2nd degree burns and open heart surgery, scars on her heart from being abandoned over and over. I know that some people wonder why we chose her. But she is my girl and I could not love her more. I claim every hair on her head and every tear and every scar. I will live my life trying to heal them and not add more. She is a child filled with joy and laughter and smiles. Somehow she has found the strength to find the happiness of childhood despite her circumstances so I need to at least be as strong as she is and be the mother she needs me to be. And that is how I'm feeling right now.

Sunday, July 12, 2009