THE SEVENTH DIAMOND

Thursday, June 14, 2007

I am a Complete Trainwreck..My Son is in Drivers Training.

I know that this doesn't seem like a big deal, but it is one of my greatest fears for my children. I'll give the background that many of you already know. My mother was killed in a horrific car accident when I was 16 years old. The coroner recommended that I not see the body. She was cremated. It was the most devastating experience of my life. My father had to force me to learn how to drive and get my licence prior to sending me to college. I had completely refused until that time.
Now here is my oldest son. My baby who has her eyes-wanting desperately to drive. His father (my ex-husband) had to call me and plead on his behalf for me to let him take the class. He said that it is so important to a young man to be able to drive. Well, it is so important to me to keep him alive. In tears I made him swear to me on the memory of his dead Grandmother that he would never drive like an ass. I know that is an empty promise. He will be 15 years old July 9th. He thinks he is untouchable.
Today was his first day of class-2 hours long. Tomorrow they are going to put him in a car. Can you believe that? 2 hours of instruction and you are in a car. I can't believe a 15 year old is considered old enough to drive. It's in his high school curriculum. He is taking the classes through the school.
I know I may seem like a whacko over this, but I AM A WHACKO OVER THIS. I am in tears just writing this.
Garfield is Zach's favorite, so that's why I used this image.

29 comments:

Noemi said...

I Have been reading your blog for a while, however never commented. I love it by the way!

I am in your same boat! My Joey will be taking his classes when he is back from Vacation. He will be 15 on June 29th. It scares me to death.

I am with you that no 15 year old should have the need to drive 17 maybe but not 15.

Ms. Dragonfly said...

RMJ~ I wish I could give you a hug. Given your circumstances, I too would be a basket case.
Although i have no words of advice, I do want to say thank you for sharing your mother's story. I had often wondered but didn't want to ask.
Pure tragedy. I've very sorry.
I cannot even imagine.

adele and dan said...

better with drivers ed than without! Make sure he always wears his seatbelt!

Lauren said...

WOW!!! So young to lose your mother. Drivers ed is definately a very scary thing for mothers to go through...I know my mom wont be looking forward to me taking it next summer!

Rachael said...

Oh, I so understand my mother's over-protectiveness now that I am a mom. My mom used to tell me, "Don't listen to loud music -- you'll get in an accident!!".

Sorry about your mom, what a horrible tragedy. I can completely understand why this is so hard for you, but you have to let him do it someday. I think making sure he gets lots of practice under your watchful eye is the key to safety. I probably will be a real pain with my kids and not let them drive with other teens in the car too. Anything you can do to stack the odds in your favor....although you know firsthand that you can't control everything.

Elise said...

I understand your fear...mine will start driver's training in a year and it scares me also. So sorry about the loss of your mom at such a young age...that must have been so hard and I am sure your son must understand too.

Dolores and Shawn said...

I understand your fear. I was in a car accident when I was in university and ever since then, the thought of driving scares the crap out of me. (((HUGS)))

eggrolls and chopsticks said...

I am so sorry that you are going through this. I agreee that 15 is way to young but remember, he is YOUR son and raised by you, a smart, intelligent person. He will be OK.

Sending Hugs, I wish I could do more.

Melissa said...

I understand your fears, and I don't even have the heart breaking story that you do.
I think the biggest fear in raising my children will be the day they drive away alone for the first time.
I feel you sweetie!

Janet said...

You poor thing! I am so sorry, but Zach need to be able to do this. I think you are SO brave for allowing it. Good job, Mom!!!

HUGS!!

Janet

tracy said...

I'm so sorry for the loss of your mother at such a young age and under such horrific circumstances. So sorry and I'm sending you a big bloggy hug.

I totally agree with you on this one tho...I can't believe that 15 year olds are allowed behind the wheel of a vehicle. But since you said we have nothing in common.... =0) nothing, nada...

Emmie said...

I can totally imagine how you must feel! Hang in there...just gotta have some faith!

Sophie's Mom said...

Oh gee... I had my license at 15 (that was a few years ago... cough... cough...) My daughter is 13. We haven't decided, but we'll have to see where she's at on her maturity level (darn, she's a mature girl so far!). We've already told her that just because she CAN take drivers ed at a certain age (I think it's 16 here in Maine) doesn't mean she WILL. It will be a privilege, not a right. They've passed some new laws around here where they can't have anyone with them for the first 6 months... I'm not sure now. I really don't want to think about it yet, but I know I will be there before I know it.

My 7 year old wants to drive the riding lawn mower, but that makes me nervous, with the risk of injury w/the blade. Ugh.

Hang in there!
Christine

nikki said...

I am so sorry about the tragic way you lost your mom -- I had no idea. It is totally understandable that you would have negative feelings about driving.
You are so not WHACKO...you just love your family.

Mom of 5 said...

You have a right to be a wreck !!
I am so sorry to read about your mother's death.
I can't imagine drivers ed with my oldest in 2 years....uggg.

Mark & Michelle said...

Wow - that is a tough one...

I am sure you have heard/thought/read all the logical reasons, but the heart doesn't follow logic...

Steffie B. said...

Oh my dear friend....I am so sorry. I can totally understand your anxiety over it. All you can do is have faith.....you know that. God will watch over him.

Holly said...

Hi. I'm Holly. I just recently came across your blog. My family has adopted a little girl from China named Grace. Feel free to visit my blog anytime!

www.hollysmeimei.blogspot.com

Isabella's Mommy & Daddy said...

Sorry to hear about your mother... My oldest son is 17 and has had his permit for 7 months.. I will not let him get his drivers license until I am comfortable.. He is okay with it..
I will pray for you all.. he will do fine.. just if you think he isn't paying enough attention then don't let him.. You know better then anyone if he is ready..
Have a GREAT day..
Kim

cougchick said...

Wow! I am so sorry for your loss and completely feel for you about your son. I can't begin to understand how scary this must be for you but I will keep your son AND you in my thoughts and prayers. Hnag in there Kimberley!

Jonni & John said...

I am so sorry to hear that you lost your mom. I completely understand your feelings. Hopefully with time, you can get more used to the idea of your son driving. You are such a great Mom, you just hang in there sweetie. :)

Hugs,
Jonni

Steffie B. said...

Good morning...just sipping my morning coffee...but I am heading out for my walk/jog! ;)

Tracy said...

I'm very sorry to hear that you lost your mother that way. I can't even imagine how difficult it would be for you at this time! Fifteen does seem so young. In NJ, where I grew up,you have to be 17 to get your license.

Angie said...

I would be whacko, too! You are in my thoughts and prayers...your son, too!

on another note, I got your post to my blog and I tried to email the owner of the China Wait loss blog by clicking on the "email me" link on the right side of the blog, but the default email is not set up properly...I don't know enough about computers to know if that's MY email or the blog...do you know who the "owner" is?

Blessings on your day!
Angie
maxandemma@charter.net

Stacy said...

I am so sorry about the loss of your mother. I would feel the SAME way about my children wanting to get behind the wheel.

Be glad you are in Michigan. Here in Kentucky the kids take the class AFTER they get their license! It is crazy. They can get their permit on their 16th birthday and have to wait for six months before they get the real deal. THEN the state signs them up for a four hour class.

L & J said...

I can SO relate! Hope just finished segment 2 and she turns 16 in July. She is currently doing all the driving so she can get enough hours in to get her license. It's just a scary time when all the friends start getting licenses and deciding whether to let her drive with them or not. I won't let her get her license until I feel she is ready. Hang in there, mom....We will get through this.

Gracie said...

I know it must be devestating but I am sure he will be okay. My mom is scared to death and it is 3 more years before I start learning how to drive. I am so sorry to hear about your mother. Mothers are hard to loose. Please feel free to visit my blog!

Miss Cleo said...

oh good luck with that!

Amy said...

I'm sorry you lost your Mom. That would shake anyone up. I think it#s better he do the driving, and have control of a car. Other wise he may just ride with crazy friends. I use to be a driving instructor for Sears driving school. 16 year olds can be very good drivers when they are not show offs! He sounds like a good kid. I would rather have the son I trust behind the wheel, and not some other kid.