tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37100528.post2903830251250084673..comments2023-10-11T06:26:34.049-04:00Comments on The Seventh Diamond: Hmmm...my 15 year old son wants to bring a girl over...when no one is home.redmaryjaneshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09768158710291676368noreply@blogger.comBlogger39125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37100528.post-4714805162187860182007-12-21T13:34:00.000-05:002007-12-21T13:34:00.000-05:00At 15 raging hormones take over the brain, overule...At 15 raging hormones take over the brain, overule common sense.<BR/>I know he is a great kid but please be home when the girlfriends are over,he will respect your decision someday(probably now if he'd care to admit).<BR/>I think you could maybe give them a lot of space when she is visiting, I know I could be alone with the boyfriend if doors were left open and Mom could check. <BR/>I respect my Mom so much for being a MOM, not trying to be a friend. ;O)kerrihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14911408157537598893noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37100528.post-14771622706719541992007-12-20T20:07:00.000-05:002007-12-20T20:07:00.000-05:00You did the right decision. There is no way, that ...You did the right decision. There is no way, that a boy, no matter how good he is, at 15 years of age will be able to resist that kind of temptation. Hormones are raging at that age girl.Yolihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06068063513978782703noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37100528.post-1140778919068026102007-12-20T19:50:00.000-05:002007-12-20T19:50:00.000-05:00Oh, I think you did the right thing! KimOh, I think you did the right thing! <BR/><BR/>Kim3 Peanutshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15124969727188599965noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37100528.post-69490664077365943002007-12-20T18:27:00.000-05:002007-12-20T18:27:00.000-05:00I think you made the decision you knew was right i...I think you made the decision you knew was right in your heart. we all want to be our kids friends,and to trust them. it's not always easy to be the parent, but you'll see they will thank you later.. Merry Christmas. lindaLindahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10139900762615875346noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37100528.post-27401260096844063992007-12-20T15:33:00.000-05:002007-12-20T15:33:00.000-05:00I trust him... I don't trust her!I trust him... I don't trust her!polkadothttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16240347480458703647noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37100528.post-1399689244977488032007-12-20T13:07:00.000-05:002007-12-20T13:07:00.000-05:00I'd say no......it's just asking for trouble.....y...I'd say no......it's just asking for trouble.....you made the right choice.....stop by....you'll see why I had to cancel lunch yesterday....and one day girlfriend.....we will do this together! ;)Steffie B.https://www.blogger.com/profile/10961855406741293851noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37100528.post-33949875531095732372007-12-20T00:39:00.000-05:002007-12-20T00:39:00.000-05:00Oh, Kim, I agree with your decision--100%! Only wh...Oh, Kim, I agree with your decision--100%! Only when a PARENT is home to supervise. Forget the spying. Forget the sibling to cramp their style. Forget the lights on and doors open. The visitors are only in the common areas of the house where everyone else will be. Even if you know this girl as your best friends daughter you have known all your life--they don't get alone time in your home. I think they see this on television and believe it is reality. Not so. And there should be a curfew on telephone calls, too. <BR/>I will tell you as I've told my friends, you have to have confidence in your parenting up to this point, but you also have to continue with the same parenting. You should definitely have the safe sex talks. Hopefully, these were started awhile back. If not, get busy with that. You won't always be with your children and they deserve to know how to protect themselves. They already know what you expect from them. Have confidence in your son. He will thank you in the future for continuing to be the same Mom and Dad you've always been. Hopefully, when he's ready to date, he'll want to go out with groups of kids. More fun with lots of friends around!Linda ★ Parker's Generalhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06580449029112777882noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37100528.post-5839599638427907232007-12-20T00:08:00.000-05:002007-12-20T00:08:00.000-05:00Oh man this is a good post and it has been fun rea...Oh man this is a good post and it has been fun reading everyone's comments. I am not really the one to give advice because my kiddos are not near that stage yet. I would agree that being home alone together would not be the best thing. It just allows to many thing to happen. Good luck with what ever you choose.Laura Nipperhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13700416199346522878noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37100528.post-49443209740800301532007-12-19T20:54:00.000-05:002007-12-19T20:54:00.000-05:00I can't offer any advice cos (a) I am not a boy an...I can't offer any advice cos (a) I am not a boy and (B) I was always goody 2 shoes. My parents let me have anyone over to the house and even let me go into my room with them cos I truly was trust worthy. <BR/><BR/>I think you need to meet the girl and take it from there. You are a very wonderful person with morals and you have raised your son this way but I do think you should establish a "relationship" with this girl before you just open your house to her and him ALONE.dawnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10929152764990722808noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37100528.post-14685745233337022762007-12-19T20:47:00.000-05:002007-12-19T20:47:00.000-05:00Yikes! I think you first initial gut instinct (mom...Yikes! I think you first initial gut instinct (mom radar) was right on...not without a parent there. Its so hard to find a balance...my oldest will be 19 in Jan, but she's a girl, and the whole bedroom door open, etc. benefits them and I think they are comforted by the fact that a lot of these decisions are taken away from them - my oldest told me (years later) that it took some of the pressure off of her - she put it own me, the adult, and her peers accepted this and the rules. Hope this helps.Leigh Annhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03502747449963880105noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37100528.post-78624323139715468052007-12-19T20:38:00.000-05:002007-12-19T20:38:00.000-05:00Very tough one.My thoughts are if they want to get...Very tough one.<BR/>My thoughts are if they want to get shall I say romantic they will find a place to be romantic if it is at your place or some other place.<BR/> If you honestly trust your son and have a very good relationshop with him you and your husband should sit down and share your concerns with your son.Let him know what will happen if he disobeys your rules.There comes a time when we need to show kids trust.(this coming from a man with no children or wife).<BR/> When all else fails ask God for the right answer he will help you decide.<BR/>Good luck,I will say a special prayer for you tonight.<BR/>Hugs,<BR/>Mr,BrianMr.Brianhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05790098447715587043noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37100528.post-71025047979206307092007-12-19T20:09:00.000-05:002007-12-19T20:09:00.000-05:00as someone who raised children, i would not let hi...as someone who raised children, i would not let him bring anyone home without a parent there. it's not him, it's the circumstances... we all are tempted in certain situations and teenagers don't make the right choices all the time. it also has to do with respect for your home. later you may face bringing a friend home and they expect to stay in the same bedroom. i know i'm older but i don't agree with that and i think that problem will never come up if you start now with the " rules ". have your home open to all friends male & female, but only when an adult is there.. that's my 2 cents worth. good luck with with ever you decide...lindaLindahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10139900762615875346noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37100528.post-62330705416054999302007-12-19T18:37:00.000-05:002007-12-19T18:37:00.000-05:00As a former cheerleading coach to freshmen, sophom...As a former cheerleading coach to freshmen, sophomores, jr and senior girls (from a catholic high school even) I would say no way would I allow kids of opposite sex to be home alone without a parent/adult... <BR/><BR/>There are just way too many things that can happen... Even the best meaning trust worthy kids can get themselves into situations that they might not be able to handle. <BR/><BR/>I would say meet the girl first get to know her and then see how you feel... Trust me even though they are "only talking" now days that means more than what it used to... :)<BR/><BR/>Hope that helps... By the way you are still a cool mom!!!Kim N Jeffhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08120793395382024170noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37100528.post-19229715378797915742007-12-19T17:22:00.000-05:002007-12-19T17:22:00.000-05:00No way. Yes, you've raised a really good boy, but...No way. Yes, you've raised a really good boy, but he is at an age where kids have raging hormones and a little too much rubbing and hugging could lead to the wrong thing especially with no parental supervision. They're not ready to be left alone with the opposite sex. Not yet anyway. Just my two cents worth....insanemommyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08024207455562384017noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37100528.post-33900161879082038762007-12-19T16:31:00.000-05:002007-12-19T16:31:00.000-05:00Hey! Well, this is a toughie! Well, I am around ...Hey! Well, this is a toughie! Well, I am around your son's age and he probably just wants some alone time with the girl. I have friends that are guys that I talk on the phone too....sometimes when something bad happens at school there good to talk too and understand. Once I even told one of my really close who I liked and we ended up "Going Out." Girls and Guys and be good frineds.....I think it will be fine but I would talk to him. Maybe have some of his friends over with him....then he may be less tempted....I would also talk to the girls parents see how they feel. I am sure your son is a responsible, mature, young man. I know he will make the right choice he is your son after all......Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37100528.post-14930990908732593132007-12-19T16:22:00.000-05:002007-12-19T16:22:00.000-05:00I am so glad I am not there yet. lolBut..... I don...I am so glad I am not there yet. lol<BR/>But..... I don't think you are a prude! I think those rules are given in love and wisdom. It's not a matter of trusting your child. It is a matter or protecting them... sometimes even from themselves. I personally would tell him he can invite her over next week in the evening when the family will be home.Jewels of My Hearthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12955029706756769653noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37100528.post-80174953896203472462007-12-19T16:00:00.000-05:002007-12-19T16:00:00.000-05:00I think someone needs to be home too... I have a 1...I think someone needs to be home too... I have a 15 yr old and he hasn't shown much interest either, but the girls of today yikes! Sometimes people are always acting like boys are the wild ones but I have seen so many girls call call call and be so touchy feely clingy... I trust my son but I don't know if a girl pushed him what he might feel he needed to do to measure up. I think teens need alot of supervision. Just as Christy said I had WAAAY to much freedom and am trying to do things totally different. She could come with us to any family type activity or come over when we we were home but I think you need to get to know her well before you leave them alone. <BR/>hugs, I feel your pain with these decisions.... Oh for them to stay young :)mommy24treasureshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17556493186975194208noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37100528.post-91095353914297774542007-12-19T15:44:00.000-05:002007-12-19T15:44:00.000-05:00I was one of those 16 year old girls comming over ...I was one of those 16 year old girls comming over to my boyfriends house (my hubby now) and I would not want my kids to have the freedom that I had. I think my parents trusted me to a fault and they should NOT have trusted me like they did becuase Kevin and I were not acting in a manner that they would have approved (if you get my drift). Looking back, I would have been pissed if Kev and I could not have been alone but we could have been alone (outside-taking a walk etc) while our parents were home. <BR/><BR/>With that said, I would not let them be alone without a parent there (or an adult). I know he will hate that decision but I think it is the best. Have her come over for dinner and meet the family. They can hang out in his room with the door open and they can take walks etc but alone with no parent-- I WOULDNT!!! You see that is easy to say now while my boys are 7 and 9 but I know I am going to have to face that when they get older and I am not looking forward to it--ugg!!!<BR/><BR/>Good luck and let us know how it turns out!!<BR/><BR/>Christy :)Christyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03077047658906478290noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37100528.post-35593844332105430142007-12-19T14:50:00.000-05:002007-12-19T14:50:00.000-05:00I am sure you have raised a nice young man but I a...I am sure you have raised a nice young man but I am old school and I wouldnt have her over without someone being home. Just to be on the safe side and you don't know what she has told her parents either. Tough one glad we aren't there yet.Cyndihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16959405674970023716noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37100528.post-62818691875876895652007-12-19T13:37:00.000-05:002007-12-19T13:37:00.000-05:00I'm not a parent yet...but I was a teenager once. ...I'm not a parent yet...but I was a teenager once. And I say NO WAY! <BR/>I remember the things I used to do at that age. And with an open invitation of having the privacy of an empty house... "things" could definitely happen.Special Khttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11824577189457099837noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37100528.post-61937659228336507222007-12-19T13:22:00.000-05:002007-12-19T13:22:00.000-05:00I don't think I would let them....maybe if she cam...I don't think I would let them....maybe if she came over a few times and met the family first.....a few times....I'm old school too.Middle-Aged Moihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05687022843803093290noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37100528.post-35621279457900693962007-12-19T12:40:00.000-05:002007-12-19T12:40:00.000-05:00This is so weird that I am reading this post becau...This is so weird that I am reading this post because I just got done watching the Today show and they were talking about teenage sex. They said that most teenagers have sex between 3-6 p.m at one of their own homes when the parents are not home. I know this is what happened to me when I was 16 (and I really regret it). For the record, I agree with Pugalicious's comment.Paulahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16054187209428838640noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37100528.post-2448160604633862692007-12-19T12:10:00.000-05:002007-12-19T12:10:00.000-05:00I have raised 5 already and I agree with pugalicio...I have raised 5 already and I agree with pugalicious and a few other.. NO ONE of the other sex at home when a parent is not home. I also agree with, basement door open, lights on, and going down to check on occasion. And in our house, no one of the other sex was EVER allowed in the bedroom. Now, all this being said, we still had one who defied the rules, had a girl into our home while we were out of town (he was supposed to be at his mothers for the weekend) and ended up in a teenage pregnancy situation. We LOVE, LOVE, LOVE our grand-daughter but the situation was NOT good. <BR/><BR/>ps.. my now 19 yr old daughter never had "boyfriends" either until a few months of "just talking". That's actually a stage of the dating relationship these days I'm told. the "just talking" stage.;-)<BR/><BR/>OK.. enough of my two cents too.Robinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04980445248386713210noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37100528.post-378554911037162942007-12-19T11:58:00.000-05:002007-12-19T11:58:00.000-05:00I wouldn't allow it. Frankly, I'd be surprised if...I wouldn't allow it. Frankly, I'd be surprised if the girl's mom did too.<BR/><BR/>I would also not make it a trust issue, just a rule. (I think I've shared with you before what I do for a living...OB/GYN...let me tell, lots of girls are doing ALL kinds of things their parents don't know about.) Why give them the temptation?<BR/><BR/>Alternately, how about having her over when you are home, or dropping them off to go skating or to a movie together?Rachaelhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00992203896914180674noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37100528.post-83022017378124420212007-12-19T11:24:00.000-05:002007-12-19T11:24:00.000-05:00Try to find a way that one of you can be there, th...Try to find a way that one of you can be there, they are definitely too young to stay in your home alone. <BR/>You can be a cool Mom and let him see girls and have friends coming over but they still are kids in a way. <BR/>Aren't the parents of the girl asking you to be there? Or do they even not care?Juliettehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08978521738473459322noreply@blogger.com